Tina Fey Shows Up In My Dream. Living My Dream...But does that mean I'm asleep?

Tina Fey.
Tina Fey was in my dream. I wouldn't say I was dreaming about Tina Fey, I was dreaming, and Tina Fey shows up. I'm standing on the rooftop in some area of NY (Queens or Brooklyn or somewhere) and it's raining. I must have been there with a couple of friends standing around and I'm holding an umbrella. And then I notice that there's a handful of people shooting some footage on top of the roof and all of sudden there's Tina. And I'm thinking, what are you doing in my dream, Tina Fey?
And then I start to wonder if she needs another writer on her genius TV series...and then I wake up.

These are the dreams you sometimes have when you're a struggling Hollywood Assistant/aspiring writer/me. Sometimes you have a convoluted mess of symbolism and literary motifs. Other times, Tina Fey shows up in your dreams.

And then I wondered if Leo and Joseph G-L were going to get here soon - you know, to portray the respective romantic interests. (Naturally.)What? I can't have them even in my own dream? Boo you.

I think about the past; I reminisce. I have a cup of my Dunkin' Donuts brewed coffee in hand and begin to wax introspectively. Goals are dreams that are reached for and, in due time, achieved. (Or failed and then achieved. Or failed multiple times and then achieved. Or just failed relentlessly. Or never attempted, which I find saddest of all.) That's all they really are. Sometimes they seem absolutely impossible, and then, one day, you find that you are sitting somewhere you've only dreamt about. So - not that I'm trying to sound cheesy, but dreams become reality. Not just for me, but for many other people.

Dreams.

I once dreamt of living in Los Angeles. Then I moved 3,000 miles and it became so.

I had a dream of working for a major television network. After a roundabout way, I landed myself in that spot.

Ever since I studied abroad in Spain, I have always wanted to share it with my family. I finally got the chance to go last year.

Goals.
I supposed these could also be found under some of your New Year's resolutions list, if you have one.

Improv classes. I took them this year. It was terrifying and painful but I did it.

Take a tango class. This one I checked off last week.

Finish a particularly pesky short story I kept shelving. That one I was able to take off my desk last month.

Find a one-bedroom apartment close to work, with parking, central air, a pool, and affordable rent. Thank goodness.

Meet a tall, intelligent, romantic, and charming gentleman who speaks four languages, knows how to salsa, cook, and make me laugh. Massage therapy training a plus.

Reflections, Paulo Coelho, and GQ

Again - ding dong, the strike is dead. Everyone's slowly emerging from their 'cautious optimism,' that things are gradually picking up.

So just some personal thoughts, since they're on the brain. The agony of career-debating and related quarterlife questions and those all-important 'transitional' periods in life continues.

After spending much of the past couple of weeks, I mean months (MONTHS!), interviewing, temping, actually cooking at home, contemplating other jobs (and less lofty aspirations), and becoming buddy-buddy with sites Defamer and 100 Days in Bed, I've had some time on my hands. To blog. To reflect. To reevaluate everything I've ever known in life. Fun, I know.

Consider other industries, possibilities, American coastal cities. I would have to say my greatest success is having survived the last several months of my own life. (Take that, cookie-cutter job interviewers!) A roller coaster of emotion, these twentysomething years. Considering all those years I've spent studying, writing, showing up prepared.

So I'm widening my horizons. My passion is film and television, my creative juice is good writing. The tools that I use and search for are wit, thoughtfulness, and brutal honesty. But it is possible that life will lead me to other places - my life in the grand scheme of things, is just one life. Wow - am I just another hack? Okay, I'll just go wherever God takes me. The only problem with having a Judy Blume moment when it's not as a kid, is that it's not as easily dismissed. Oh, character building experiences of your twenties. If only I could somehow include the aforementioned on my resume...

"We who fight for our dream suffer far more when it doesn't work out, because we cannot fall back on the old excuse: 'Oh, well, I didn't really want it anyway.' We do want it and know that we have staked everything on it and that the path of the personal calling is not easier than any other path, except that our whole heart is in this journey." Oh, Paulo Coelho. Do you have any idea what you've done?

COTW

This week, it's whatever Cecil Donahue was having when writing about job interviews in GQ's February 2008 issue.